How social media is making you polygamous (Part Three)

Online, many of us today interact with tens and hundreds of people a day but without really relating with any of them. Our communications are limited to things that bring no discomfort such as jokes, inspirational messages, Bible verses with good promises, etc. (most of which are often forwarded). Anyone who sends us or posts messages that condemn or rebuke or oppose anything we do or believe in, that one we block, mute, unfollow or unfriend because we do not want any “negative energy”. We do not want to invest in understanding anyone but are always fiercely demanding to be understood.

Meanwhile, offline, we hardly focus on the people we are with to give them the attention they deserve because our minds are always wherever our phones are—wondering what our virtual friends have posted online. We keep our phones on as if there is a life support app installed on them. We do not miss any notification about a new message or an update from any of our online friends.

Essentially, we have relegated our physical interactions with others to a mere by the way to the point that any person—parents, siblings, children, friends, etc.—stands higher chances of getting our attention if they communicate to us via our social media channels even if we are only an arm’s distance away from them.

Without any meaningful interactions online and not caring much for real-life interactions, we today find ourselves in the same place as the polygamous man—having many relationships but all shallow.

This lack of depth to our relationships has greatly limited our individual growth and ability to reach our goals and dreams in life because we do not have the people (the most important ingredient for success) we need in our lives to enable us proper. The many “friends” that we have occupy a place so shallow in our lives we would rather die than tell them we have no food to eat. Meanwhile, we are also largely insignificant in people’s lives because we are only there with them when all is well.

We need to realise and appreciate what is at stake for us and be deliberate about meaningfully investing in our relationships with other people. Whatever dreams you have, whatever plans you have, you will, at the very least, need people to bring them to life because no man is an island.

Relating meaningfully with family, friends, or any other people—relating beyond convince—will without a doubt come with its load of unpleasant moments but we need to recognise the bonding opportunities those moments present us with and not dash to social media so they can pass.

Remember, only a friend in need is a friend indeed.